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Harmony in the Household
What a peaceful word, HARMONY.
Take a deep breath, and just exhale... “harmony.”
You’re already feeling some peace, aren’t you? But how elusive is lasting harmony when we’ve been in the same house with the same people for what has seemed to be an eternity?
Here are some truths that I have had to repeat to myself throughout the lockdown that have not only helped me find peace of my own, but also helped me to maintain a servant’s perspective.
Be Patient. Oh man, am I bad at this one! I seldom have enough patience to work through my own school/house/work stuff and now I’ve got to work through these math problems with little sister?? Yes, we do! The Israelites were perhaps the most impatient, short-sighted, ornery people group described in the Bible, but through the whining and complaining, the idolatry and the adultery, God remained patient with them, his chosen people. The same Spirit of patience now lives in us, hang your hat on it and lean into God through those moments when you can think of nothing you’d like more than to storm off and quit!
Be Humble. Jesus is our Lord and Savior, but how often do we really dig into that? Growing up, I had always heard something along the lines of Jesus being my “Lord and Savior,” but so often we emphasize Him being Savior and miss the idea of Him being Lord. Jesus is both and; His desire is not only that His people find life in Him but also that we do life with Him. That looks like hitting our knees everyday with a prayer of surrender and taking action when the Spirit is prompting us to make moves. When we get in the habit of submitting everything we are to God and being obedient to what He asks of us, we will find that humility comes far more naturally.
Be Gracious. This is a big one! Our homes will never be harmonious if we keep track of every blessed wrong that others do to us. We can do everything else right, but when we decide to hold onto the anger and the frustration that are bound to build up quickly when people are held in close quarters with one another, we will be miserable. Forgive quickly and forgive fully. Nobody’s Perfect. That includes you, you are going to have to forgive yourself for being a jerk to your spouse or for being harsh with your children. First and foremost, you must apologize, but dwelling on and harping on yourself will only lead to you and those around you missing the joy that God desires for us.
So, what does it take to have harmony
with those whom we spend the most time?
Love. We love because Jesus first loved us, but love is such a loaded word that gets watered down in today’s culture to merely mean fondness or affinity. I think Paul has a much more holistic definition of love in his letter to the
Corinthians:
Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.
360 COACHING - WHAT IS IT?
Being In The 99
Have fun. Serve. Honor.
When I took over as the Director for Carroll County FCA in the summer of 2022, I knew that my heart was for relational ministry. But what did that mean? As I read through the Gospels and see the daily life that Jesus and His disciples lived together, I thought to myself, is this feasible? Can we live in relationship like Jesus did? Will our efforts even make a difference in people’s lives as it did the disciples and those they witnessed to? Relational ministry sounds good, but in this world of bigger, faster, and stronger, where the strength is in numbers and social media presence is king, can slowing down our local ministry and building lifelong relationships really make a big impact in our fast-moving world? In the last six months, God has encouraged me and answered with a resounding YES!! Here are some examples of how God used others to answer the questions of my heart.
We are impressionable, we need guidance, we seek approval, we desire experiences that allow us to make a difference. “FCA full time, that’s not for me”, I thought to myself as my time at McDaniel was coming to a close. “You don’t have to be in full time ministry to do ministry” rang through my head. But then why do I have a desire to push towards working as a missionary? Should I chase this, is this a selfish desire, can I provide for my family doing this, are some of the questions that were running through my mind. It all started with an internship in the summer of 2015 at Crossroads , Joe Laughlin, the youth director at the time provided me with the opportunity to serve, lead, travel, and experience the provision of God while being challenged along the way. It was such a wonderful experience, even if it meant getting up at 4am, having a phone stolen in the jungle, prepping a 100 ft. slip and slide…these are stories for another time. It was full of deep study of theology, simple conversations with students, and for the first time being immersed in a lifestyle that was more about bringing glory to God than anything else. That summer internship experience was pivotal for me, it changed the entire direction and mindset I had going back to college. I had new goals and dreams and was ready to continue to grow and to lead. God provided financially, with lodging, with food, with relationships, and community so fast I almost couldn’t keep up. Now as I help with the internship within the Carroll County FCA world, I strive to provide an experience that pushes college aged student athletes to take their relationship with the risen Jesus to the next level. We try to give a realistic image of what it takes to be full time with FCA, and learn how our faith in Jesus is not just something we do, but it is who we are. It is woven into every aspect of our life. It is not a Sunday thing, or where we work, or an organization to volunteer for. It is about a Christian lifestyle that is centered on Jesus and his great commission! The FCA internship has been a great launching point for young student athletes to get a glimpse of what full time staff is all about, it has been used to demonstrate that you can live a Christian lifestyle no matter what your occupation is. Here are some quotes from past interns: “My experience with the FCA internship helped me realize my true worth in Christ. It helped show me what it really means to follow Jesus, pray, and study the Bible and not go through life lukewarm” - Jeanine Kent “The internship was a great experience. It gave me an inside look to how a ministry operates behind the scenes. I loved going to work every day, and I made some great friendships through it. It drew me closer to the Lord and I would recommend it to anyone thinking about applying.” – Jake Leitner “My experience within FCA’s internship changed the direction of my life entirely. My mentors for those few months were used by God to literally change the trajectory of my thinking and ultimately lead me to falling in love with the Lord and breaking my heart for what breaks His. From humility to patience to community to discovering my calling - each piece of the puzzle started to fit together after serving and learning through this ministry. I will forever be grateful to the FCA staff for allowing me to accept God’s grace for my life and live out my purpose. Not to mention, having mentors that will be there for me anytime. I still consistently reminisce on days in the CCFCA office.” – Meghan Schmidt
Community During COVID-19
Athletes and coaches alike have good days and bad days. Somedays, it can easily be hidden. Practices and games might help relieve the mental and physical pressures caused by upcoming exams, family-induced stresses or depressive moods. Other times, it’s not so easily hidden and it shows up in different ways- attitude, performance of play, or in what is spoken. We all know what it feels like to have a rotten day. No matter what sort of day you may be facing in practice, on game day, at home, or school or any other place, this truth remains: God is with you in the valleys “Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil. For you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me.” Psalm 23:4 The psalmist, King David, walks in confidence and comfort instead of fear. Understanding WHO God is impacts the psalmist’s well-being. David is able to declare “I will fear no evil, for you are with me.” There is peace when fully surrendered to God. When athletes understand the presence and preparedness of their coach, it changes how they respond under the pressures of practice or game day. This points to a second truth: God will lead you through the valleys. Timothy Ateek, a speaker from Breakaway Ministries speaks well on Psalms 23 on their podcast episode titled The Valley of the Shadow of Death.” Take some time to listen as he speaks on the matter of how in our pain, it can rattle our beliefs in God and how it forces us to determine what we really believe to be really true about God. Where in your life might someone/ something else get the credit for the good times in your life where God gets blamed for the bad things? If God is our good Shepherd, then our goal must be: grateful in the good times and faithful in the bad times. Whether it be a good practice or maybe a loss on game day, your current circumstances do not exceed the plans God has for your life. He is always more than what you know Him to be. Ravi Zacharias once said, “You’ll never get to a person’s soul until you understand their hurts.” Jesus understands our hurts, more than what we could ever comprehend. He experienced the valleys, he was tempted, he mourned, he was rejected, abused, all because of His love for us. "For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life. For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world, but to save the world through him.Whoever believes in him is not condemned, but whoever does not believe stands condemned already because they have not believed in the name of God’s one and only Son.This is the verdict: Light has come into the world, but people loved darkness instead of light because their deeds were evil. Everyone who does evil hates the light, and will not come into the light for fear that their deeds will be exposed. But whoever lives by the truth comes into the light, so that it may be seen plainly that what they have done has been done in the sight of God. John 3:16-21 Consider : “Can God lead you through a moment or season of deep darkness and still be fully good, fully trustworthy, fully faithful, and fully worthy of your life in worship?”- Ateek My hope is that your answer would be “Yes” to that question. I, as well as FCA staff, believe, love, and serve this God- who is fully good, trustworthy, faithful, and worthy of each of our lives dedicated to worship Him in everything we do. My prayer is that my heart, as well as yours, would be inclined to ask God: “Teach me your ways, O God, I will walk in your truth. Unite my heart to fear your name.” Psalms 86:11
What a peaceful word, HARMONY . Take a deep breath, and just exhale... “ harmony .” You’re already feeling some peace, aren’t you? But how elusive is lasting harmony when we’ve been in the same house with the same people for what has seemed to be an eternity? Here are some truths that I have had to repeat to myself throughout the lockdown that have not only helped me find peace of my own, but also helped me to maintain a servant’s perspective. Be Patient . Oh man, am I bad at this one! I seldom have enough patience to work through my own school/house/work stuff and now I’ve got to work through these math problems with little sister?? Yes, we do! The Israelites were perhaps the most impatient, short-sighted, ornery people group described in the Bible, but through the whining and complaining, the idolatry and the adultery, God remained patient with them, his chosen people. The same Spirit of patience now lives in us, hang your hat on it and lean into God through those moments when you can think of nothing you’d like more than to storm off and quit! Be Humble . Jesus is our Lord and Savior, but how often do we really dig into that? Growing up, I had always heard something along the lines of Jesus being my “Lord and Savior,” but so often we emphasize Him being Savior and miss the idea of Him being Lord. Jesus is both and; His desire is not only that His people find life in Him but also that we do life with Him. That looks like hitting our knees everyday with a prayer of surrender and taking action when the Spirit is prompting us to make moves. When we get in the habit of submitting everything we are to God and being obedient to what He asks of us, we will find that humility comes far more naturally. Be Gracious . This is a big one! Our homes will never be harmonious if we keep track of every blessed wrong that others do to us. We can do everything else right, but when we decide to hold onto the anger and the frustration that are bound to build up quickly when people are held in close quarters with one another, we will be miserable. Forgive quickly and forgive fully. Nobody’s Perfect. That includes you, you are going to have to forgive yourself for being a jerk to your spouse or for being harsh with your children. First and foremost, you must apologize, but dwelling on and harping on yourself will only lead to you and those around you missing the joy that God desires for us. So, what does it take to have harmony with those whom we spend the most time? Love . We love because Jesus first loved us, but love is such a loaded word that gets watered down in today’s culture to merely mean fondness or affinity. I think Paul has a much more holistic definition of love in his letter to the Corinthians : Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. 1 Corinthians 13:4-7 NIV
Strengthen Your Quarantine!
The origin of FCA at McDaniel College is one that you simply cannot make up. The goal was pure, all we wanted to do was spend time together and find a place where we belonged for reasons deeper than our majors and what sport we played. Five or six student athletes met with a youth pastor who had a heart for college athletes in the basement of the Gill Center one night in the fall of 2013 and that was the start of the planning and dreaming. We had to just show up and give it a try. I had been recruited by coach Hoyt (head football) coach. He was a catalyst for leadership, personal development, and his faith was so attractive to me because it was woven into everything he did. That was one of the first times I had ever seen that in a person, let alone a coach. Joe Laughlin was the next, “that” youth pastor (now part time FCA staff) that had a heart for little McDaniel College. He met with us right where we were. We could not have predicted the growth that was to come because of a simple meeting. The Timeline • 2013 fall initial meeting started to spend time together • 2014 met more regularly led to planning and dreaming the Wednesday night huddle • 2014 started a guys breakfast study/fellowship time at Plum Krazy Dinner. • 2015-16 school year started the Wednesday night huddle continued with the guys breakfast study • 2016 Wednesday night continues to grow, lots of first timer people – students are excited to get their own FCA shirt and bible. • 2016 girls started a bible study with the McDaniel softball character coach • 2017-18 FCA votes for a leadership team and is a recognized club on campus! • 2017-18 leadership meetings start meeting regularly at Joe’s house • McDaniel huddle has continued to go through peak and valleys, and now has a girls and guys bible study meeting during the week, in addition to the Wednesday night meetings! • Currently they are still meeting faithfully and every year there is a need for Jesus to be made famous on that campus more and more every year! Diving Deeper into the Start We continued meeting, We started by simply going to Joe’s house, to watch games and eat some incredible food thanks to his wife! The Laughlin’s invited us, college kids into their home to eat and spend time with their family. This was a strange concept at first to us, but we loved it. We just had to trust and give it a shot. Strategy Moving Ahead Two quotes from Andrew Roberts set the framework for what our strategy would be. One being “Lets be regulars at a diner.” The guys started going to Plum Krazy Diner on Friday morning that week to talk about a few verses in the bible and to eat together. We quickly became regulars there and it was my favorite part of the week - full of great conversations, advice, insight and my first taste of authentic Christian community. We were there because we wanted to, all we did was show up! Andrew Roberts said “I just want some good wholesome fun.” A strange sentence that took us all off guard, it remains a joke to this day between our little group. The stigma of the boring judgmental Christians had been felt on the McDaniel campus, and we were out to break that stereotype. So we moved toward personal growth - through meeting with Joe and going to church together, through time together the huddle planning started to form,. We just had to give it a try even though we were far from perfect. The late nights at the Laughlin’s turned into great memorizes of fun and fellowship, and eventually turned into a time to plan and pray for our school, that was where the idea of a “late night huddle” in the press box was born. A place that was open to all student athletes. “Let’s keep it simple, play some games, hang out, and hear a lesson or speaker.” That was the decision. Plain and simple. Our initial leadership team just asked and invited, we found most people were so friendly and open, and we were able to use the press box for our meetings. All of those things came together and we experienced growth very quickly. Leaving it Behind in Better Hands As the original team graduated, the future was uncertain for McDaniel FCA. I can remember praying with my roommate George who was now a regular at FCA, received his first bible, and met the Lord personally after one of Joe’s talks. We prayed with all our guys at Plum Krazy one Friday morning for the next batch of leaders that were going to take FCA to the next level. God answered that prayer much faster than we expected. There were a few that really stepped up led by Kyle Savick (the first official FCA president) and a few others. They got the FCA club “officially recognized” by the college and put some real framework around leadership positions, doing studies together, branching out and starting a girls bible study, and a more intentional guys bible study. It spread to teams with character coaches and every team on campus started to have people involved in the Wednesday night huddle. A “Different” Culture The friendships were real, the talks were authentic and challenging, the community was attractive. It became a place where anyone could come and feel loved and accepted for who they are, while being lovingly challenged to turn your life over to Jesus Christ. “It feels like a family,” as communicated by Alyssa Swartz in her testimony, and that is the feeling from many others too. Being faithful to meet on Wednesday nights started in the 2013-2014 school year. They are still meeting in the same place today! The McDaniel huddle is a beautiful picture of what God can do when we are faithful with a little. Showing up is the battle, staying constant through the ups and downs of life is the key. Because of the faithfulness of the leadership of students and staff has made Wednesday night a highlight for hundreds of student athletes at McDaniel college over the years. Going Strong The McDaniel FCA group was started by a few, that had very little knowledge about FCA and were relying on a very simple foundation of who Jesus is and wanting to share it with others. But God sent a few leaders at the perfect time that encouraged us to try something new. They pushed us to stop relying on our own strength and give it up to the Lord. When we did that, I really felt the peace of God in my life and that has led to an incredible involvement and impact for McDaniel students. Today McDaniel has a full leadership team. They are planning meetings, male and female bible studies, and discipleship groups. There are people now on staff that came through the “FCA McDaniel Farm System.” McDaniel sends volunteers and interns to camps all over the region to serve coaches and athletes. Growth continues through the imperfect student athletes at McDaniel college, that is how God works. We just have to show up. We must be willing to try when we are uncomfortable, if we are always comfortable, we will never grow. God calls us to fully rely on Him. Through FCA at McDaniel, I learned so much about taking risks and just trying, letting God have control, and getting out of his way. My challenge is to ask yourself, “Where is God calling you to simply take a chance and show up?” Just wait and see what God is going to do, it might be nerve racking but you won’t be disappointed.
